Thursday, June 23, 2011

Writer’s Malaise

I don’t have writer’s block. More like writer’s malaise, for I have plenty of topics I would like to write about and plenty of thoughts about how I would like to write on those topics. I just lack the desire to write. At least right now.

Yes. I am writing now. Technically. This blog, at least. But I am doing so with a fake-it-until-you-make-it attitude. This approach has served me well when employed in a position that required me to write something like a news release or a brochure on someone else’s deadline, so it should work now. In fact, I believe in that method so much that I nearly self-inflicted a deadline for some of the blogs I want to write as a way to push me out of my current state of mind. My writer’s malaise.

But I don’t want to. I would rather live this feeling of discomfort as long as it lingers. It must be telling me something; therefore, I need to honor it until I catch its clues.

Meanwhile, I’ll continue to open Word documents and place notes for future blogs in them. I’ll make as many of those files as I care to, and they will populate the desktop of my laptop like empty foundations of unfinished homes in a developing neighborhood. Then one day I will begin to build on those ideas. What takes shape will help me feel at home again, and I will know that I have healed.

Malaise. I believe I could write more about it, but I don’t want to.

Perhaps one day.

Someday.

Until then, cherish your life’s involuntary joys. I continue to cherish mine. This blog included. Thanks for reading.